Your Daily Slice

ADAR 22

Divorce

 

“And it has been said, ‘Whoever PUTS AWAY his wife, let him give her a CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE.’ “But I say to you that whoever puts away his wife, except for the matter of whoring, makes her commit adultery. And whoever marries a woman who has been put away commits adultery.” (Mat 5:31-32 ISR, emphasis mine)

“When a man takes a wife and shall marry her, then it shall be, if she finds no favour in his eyes because he has found a matter of uncoveredness in her, and he shall write her a CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE, and put it in her hand, and SEND HER OUT of his house …” (Deu 24:1 ISR)

 

Marriage is to be a ‘covenant obligation’ between a man and a woman, a covenant recognizing the obligations each one has toward the other, faithfully being carried out according to the Word of our Elohim. The word translated from the Hebrew into our word ‘covenant’ is the word beriyt (Strong’s H1285), and as with so much of the Hebrew language, a great deal is lost in translation.  This word means more than just a covenant, or an agreement; it also portrays an obligatory relationship between individuals, an established and continually growing relationship, nurtured and cultivated.  The covenantal obligation between Abraham and Elohim is one example of this, as is the relationship between a husband and wife.

Because of the disobedience of Adam and Chavah (Eve, Strong’s H2332), we know that sin – transgression of Elohim’s Torah - entered the Garden of Eden, and corrupted everything, including the marriage relationship with its covenant obligations.  People’s hearts became totally selfish and self-centered, concentrating on personal fulfillment and gratification.  Turning their desires inward and becoming self-seeking, mankind was now hard and cruel toward one another.  Divorce, and remarriage, became permissible under Torah (Deu 24:1-4), though it was never Elohim’s original design.  However, an understanding of exactly what Torah says concerning divorce is needed before we can understand what our Master Yeshua addressed throughout the Gospels.

In Deuteronomy chapter 24, there are two SEPARATE actions taken against the wife that has not found favor: the sending away, or dismissing, and then the issue of the certificate of divorce.  Two different and distinct words are used in the Hebrew: Shlicha (Strong's H7971), which means to send away, dismiss, or release, and sefer k’ritot (Strong's H3748), which is the actual certificate of divorce. The reason the wife did not find favor is because of an ‘uncoveredness’, for which the Hebrew word is ervah (Strong's H6172), literally translated as nakedness, but implying an uncleanness due to any and all illicit or illegal sexual activity.  If the wife was merely ‘sent away’ (Shlicha), she was not legally divorced, and could not re-marry.  Only with a corresponding “certificate of divorcement” (sefer k’ritot) would she be allowed to re-marry.

We find the same separate actions in the passage from Matthew chapter 5.  Our Master Yeshua was again emphasizing the need for both actions to take place, and not just the one, the ‘putting away’.  Apparently, at that time, the norm was for men to ‘put away’ (apoluō, Strong's G630) their wives, without the binding certificate (apostasion, Strong's G647), as evidenced in Mark 10:1-12.  We find in verses 11 and 12 of this chapter, Yeshua confirming the reason for both actions to be taken:  the ‘putting away’ (apoluō) is not enough, it is not a legal release or divorce, and to re-marry without the “certificate of divorce” (apostasion) will constitute adultery (punishable by death).

In Matthew 5:31, Yeshua lists fornication (or whoring) as a reason for putting away and divorce.  The Word found here in the Greek is the word porneia (Strong's G4202), from which we have our word ‘pornography’.  Porneia involves ALL illicit sexual activity, all perversions, including homosexuality, bestiality, and every form of incest (see Rom 1:18 through 2:8).  We can surmise that sexual abuse was well known during the days of our Messiah, even as it is today.

Yet what about other forms of abuse: physical, mental, verbal, emotional?  Abuse of any form is wrong; it is a violation against Torah.  For so many years, the westernized church system has preached a doctrine that because “God hates divorce” (Mal 2:16), women (and even men!!!) must stay married, regardless of the abusive situation they are in.  I do not believe this is correct.  Though the ideal marriage would be between two Torah observant individuals, it is unfortunate that most marriages never start that way.  However, even in these instances where forms of abuse are prevalent within a marriage, divorce should always be the last option – but it is a VALID option.

Divorce is not the "unforgivable sin".  Yes, our Elohim hates divorce, for the trauma, pain, destruction, and strife that it generates, but to “blanket-ly” say that God hates all divorce is not correct.  Abraham was told in no uncertain terms to ‘put away’ Hagar, the slave woman (mother of Ishmael) with whom he had a covenant relationship (see Gen 21:10-14).  In Ezra chapter 10, Elohim, through Ezra the priest, instructed the people of Israel to ‘put away’ all the foreign wives that they had taken to themselves during the time of the captivity – the reason for this ‘putting away’ being, these wives were pagan and worshiped idols instead of the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. 

There are men and women, brothers and sisters, who have been divorced, perhaps for the wrong reasons, and are living under terrible guilt and condemnation.  This guilt is not from our Abba Father.  Run to Abba; crawl up into His lap and repent of whatever wrong you did.  There is still healing for all the pain and trauma available, and deliverance from all of the bondage and damage that has been done.  Love covers, His grace and favor know no limits, and His mercies are new every morning …

 

“If, then, the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.”  (John 8:36)

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